City Desk

The 2009 National Douchebag Tournament: DOES THE OCTOMOM HAVE WHAT IT TAKES??

In the most heated bracket-based throwdown since Man Madness, Holy Taco has launched its 2009 National Douchebag Tournament, whereby d-bagz compete against other d-bagz in four categories (sports, entertainment, politics, and business) en route to the ultimate prize (as yet unspecified).

Notable matchups include A-Rod vs. Bellichick and Beckham vs. Bonds in the sports division, and Octomom vs. Dane Cook in the entertainment division.

All of which is good clean fun, to my mind. But the Politics Division is a real letdown. I mean, there's a pretty disappointing pattern here: Slightly loudmouthed (OK, sometimes more than slightly loudmouthed) leftist goes up against some sort of heinous, far-right succubus. Observe:

This, to me, is a really, really tepid shot at centrism on the part of the Taco. Are they actually suggesting that Harry Reid is a fouler personage than Ann Coulter? Or that Michael Moore's moderately successful movies are douchier than Bush's warmongering? There's hardly a pairing here that even approximates a level playing field. Arianna Huffington runs a left-leaning publication and writes the occasional middlebrow editorial; Rush Limbaugh jeers dying senators. I'll give 'em the Spitzer/O'Reilly one, though it's a stretch. But come on: Is this fair? How can we commies possibly hope to compete?

By way of a teaser, the Taco is pitting Katherine Heigl against Ryan Seacrest. To wit:

Voting begins noon eastern tomorrow.

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Comments

  1. #1

    Dude, it's totally unrealistic to expect liberal softies to get better seeding that the wingnut fireballs; and yeah, brackets are essentially unfair unbalanced in the early rounds--they pit shitty teams against good teams.

  2. #2

    Come on, Beck-Blagojevich is clearly the most reasonable pairing, not Spitzer-O'Reilly.

  3. #3

    I'm with KCinDC--Beck 'n' Blago sounds like a helluva match!

  4. #4

    Wait, Bill O'Reilly is ranked 13th out of 16 for douchebaggery? How can any ranking system that produces that result be taken at all seriously?

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