Cal Ripken, Please Confess to Taking Something
After Alex Rodriguez's moisty ESPN interview acknowledging what sure smells like a small portion of his actual drug use, baseball's almost ready to put the dirty dealings of its Dead Balls Era™ in the rear-view mirror.
Almost. There's still one holdup: Cal Ripken hasn't been nailed yet.
Every other boy of summer that any kid of the 1990s and beyond ever looked up to has already been ruined during the federal government's bizarre 'roid raids.
Cal's the last man standing.
Ripken always said he cared deeply about the game of baseball. If you meant it, Cal, please come forward now and confess.
Make something up if you have to. Just say you watched your pal Brady Anderson grow overnight from a base-stealing, punch-and-judy hitter into a mini-McGwire, and when Anderson nailed 50 homers in 1996, you started putting things in your body.
Who wouldn't believe that? You don't even have to say what it was you took, Cal. Nobody does anymore!
Then we can all move on.
Until we exhume Babe Ruth's body. That dude HAD to be juiced.
11:35 am
If it were to come out that Ripken juiced, I think that would just end the game of baseball entirely. How could they continue playing at that point? Ripken is the only player from the Steroid era who is beyond suspicion. Finding out he juiced would be a million times worse for baseball than finding out A-Rod juiced.
8:55 am
Forget A-Rod! I'm more interested in other 103 names in that list that had A-Rod name in it. BTW, leave Cal Ripkin Jr out of this! Unless you have hard evidence or proof he was one of the 104 players who tested positive for performance enhancing drugs, you need to drop this theory and move on!
9:20 pm
Don't forget Ken Griffey Jr. He had fabulous stats thru-out the Roid Era yet stayed small and fast. And I'll never believe the Iron Man was involved in this mess.
9:27 pm
Dirty D:
"Roid Era"?
Huh? What's that?
oh, wait a minute! don't you mean "Dead Balls Era™"?
i thought so...
10:23 pm
Please McK, I'm not playing into your marketing scheme. Besides, if something is trademarked, doesn't that mean you have to pay its creator each time you use it? I ain't got that kinda scrilla!
As for Junior, that guy should have taken more roids. It certainly would have helped him recover from that absurd litany of injuries he suffered in his twilight years. What a loser.
12:54 pm
Dave:
i can't force you or Dirty D to use Dead Balls Era™ to describe baseball's gelded age. i just think you should use Dead Balls Era™. I think everybody should use Dead Balls Era™.
Google still tells me i'm alone on this.
that won't stop me! long live Dead Balls Era™!!!!
1:25 pm
I like "baseball's gelded age" better than D.B.E.