Mayor Fenty: Please Powder Your Head
Dear Mayor Fenty,
I caught your appearance last night on NewsTalk with Bruce DePuyt. You were, at the time, talking about schools, saying things about, well, I don't know what you were saying specifically because I could not get past the shine on your head. I mean, it was impressive. I could see myself in the glare of that thing. It appeared you had oiled your head before going on camera. Either that, or you and Dave had just gotten off your bike built for two. What I am saying is that you need to tell your people to tell the people over at News Channel 8 that they need to stock up on some talc if you're going to be stoppping by. I'm not anti-bald. I like bald. My father is bald. But if you want me to listen to your bland soundbytes, you've got to do something about that shiny pate.
Thanks for listening. Your friend,
Jule
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4:08 pm
I think a basic makeup primer might take care of that. Powder would look cakey after a while, but there are plenty of clear-ish primers that would "matte-ify" the mayor.
I am happy to see him without that annoying black fedora. I think his summer hat should be a Nats hat, and his winter hat should be one of those little knit redskins caps with a pom-pom on top that you used to be able to buy on the street.
5:19 pm
I'd like to see him to bring back the stove-pipe hat.
5:27 pm
Fenty really needs to be wearing a hat in this sun -- and not the black one. Maybe a nice panama.
I remember seeing him collapse at a speaking event a couple of years back, before he was mayor. It was a very hot, sunny day -- not good for bald guys.
7:24 pm
"Maybe a nice panama."
Hmmm, a certain Mayor-for-life used to wear one of those a lot. Perhaps Fenty should think about something else; maybe a nice light colored trilby.