New York Mag Guy: Not Cheating Is Just Too Hard, For Men
The confessional of a cheating heart in the most recent New York magazine really got me going, as, I’m sure, the editors hoped it would. This Philip Weiss guy has dug about a millimeter into the subject and come up with scientific proof men just can’t help sticking it in other women for a little variety! And enough with that female morality bull! Can’t American ladies just be a bit more French! (I mean, really, I think we already are. It’s just that we don’t talk about it.) I hope Weiss isn’t what galavanting young City Paper scribes grow up to become. (Sorry Franklin, just kidding.)
3 Responses to “New York Mag Guy: Not Cheating Is Just Too Hard, For Men”
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May 21st, 2008 at 9:33 am
Angela,
I think women are just as bad as the average woman has had more sex partners than the average man.
Maybe women like getting it stuck in them as much as guys liking sticking.
May 21st, 2008 at 12:02 pm
I have to agree with Jay - with the exception that relationships are not a sticking/pissing contest at the end of the day - its about how one wants to live their life and interact with their partner. Philip Weiss sounds like a DB, but he is saying what a lot of men are thinking…I imagine a number of young City Paper readers (male) would identify with him. Your plug should make mention of the larger NYMag argument - should marriages be ‘monogamous, passive and guilt-ridden’ or can couples be honest and forthright with each other about their desires, which, sure, could lead to swinging or could lead to…a healthier relationship. Who knew!?
It’s a good article. Much better than The Atlantic’s BS article, “Marry Him.”
May 21st, 2008 at 12:41 pm
The liberal argument usually centers around the idea that individuals should be allowed to choose a lifestyle. In American society, the appropriate attitude towards sex within marriage is supposed to be one of monogamy.
It would seem that most Americans are much like their European counterparts before marriage. Both men and women engage in serial monogamy. While this may lead some to believe that both men and women are sluts, one has to factor in the issue of selectivity. There are individuals of both sexes that are undesirable for a multitude of reasons and so the availability of sex will be reduced for them. That means that some women and men will have many partners and be players/sluts. Others will have less partners and will pathetic/nice. Of course all binaries have externalities.
Maybe all of this changes once the mating moves to an official marriage. And perhaps a more permanent monogamous relationships is more conducive to the rearing of children and reductions in violence. Experts in the field of socio-biology contend that the lack of mates leads to an increase in violence. That is the big worry moving forward in China, where female infants have been
murdered (aborted) at an alarming rate. The men are going to find that there are not enough mates and the women are going to find that there are more men than they need. Can you see the potential for murder and rape?
The issue of sex and monogamy is complex with many factors and effects on society. While we love to look across the ocean and praise the Europeans for being so much more civilized, it is a view that seems to sugar coat history and cheapen the debate about a serious issue.
We are all different and have the right to make choices. But we also live in communities that depend on the adoption of codes that will allow our species to continue to adapt and progress. We will probably always need to debate and adapt these codes in order to survive.