Tape Me Out
I don’t share the City Paper’s institutional hatred of CVS—I mean, is there a drug store that people actually enjoy going to? (Pipe down, Midwesterners.) When I was a kid, it was called People’s; now it’s called CVS, and as far as I can see only the generics are different.
ANYWAY, that doesn’t mean I actually like the place, or that I can even begin to understand why buying a pair of shoelaces at the CVS on Columbia Road occasioned a 44-inch receipt. On the one hand, I like the savings I get with my ExtraCare card. On the other, I feel a little guilty about the forest in Northern Michigan that just got denuded so I can save $2 on my next purchase of any Tums 36ct or Higher.
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The obvious way to assuage your guilt: Offset the environmental effects (i.e. sequester some carbon) by growing some cheeba in your back yard.
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[...] Yesterday, I left the house to find a filing cabinet positioned where the dresser had been. I approached the cabinet eagerly. I shook it. I lifted it. I opened and closed each drawer. Ultimately, I decided to leave the filing cabinet—I have few files—but I did manage to recover some leftover magnet poetry from the inside of a drawer. (Until now, a single American flag magnet has precariously supported my refrigerator’s small collection of postcards and CVS receipts). [...]