This Just in: Kittens, Children Adorable
With the recent onslaught of virtual "lolcats"—those grammatically-challenged felines who may, perhaps, have requested to "has" your "cheezburger"—the flesh-and-blood kitty may seem like a dying breed.
But real cats are still breeding like crazy in the District—and while this may result in an overload of bum cats, it also means that, on periodic Saturdays on Belmont Road and 18th Street NW, there's a house full of diminutive little fur-balls waiting to charm you into letting them take up a permanent seat on your couch. Beware! While these kittens may lack the loose command of the English language displayed by their virtual counterparts, they have another trick up their sleeves: they are really fucking cute.
Just ask these kids...
...who, after excitedly retelling how they found their last cat petrified on the porch, went away with one half of the kitten pile known as "Eenie, Meenie, Miney, and Moe." But don't despair—my sources tell me that "Ipso" and "Facto" are still up for grabs.
The adoption clinic, run by Metro Ferals in conjunction with a handful of other cat-rescue groups, appears next on August 4.
4:37 pm
Anybody who hates cats should be run over by a garbage truck.
5:18 pm
I like cats. I own one. But occasionally you come across that animal lover who reads too much Peter Singer and believes cats are on the same moral and ethical plane as humans.
I was joking about the reading part. These cat lovers lack the reasoning skills to read arguments. They don't take kindly to opposing viewpoints.
Alas, I'm just as superficial as these cat lovers. That's why I cuddle with a cat and not an iguana.
1:07 am
Whatever Rees. Go spam another website. You're completely insane, and a danger to others. Your opinion is worth absolutely nothing.