The Sleigher: Power Flow, “Forever Alone en Navidad”
HO HO QUIÉN: José Rubén Bernal, aka Power Flow, a notoriously tone-deaf reggaetonero from El Salvador known for his creative use of low-budget CGI in such YouTube hits as “Bun Bun” and “Jaqueando Tu Amor” (that’s “Hacking Your Love”). He is joined, as always, by an ever-expanding cast of “DJs” who don’t seem to actually do anything, and a dog that sometimes sings. We think it’s a joke, but given how terrible El Salvador’s reggaeton scene is (Exhibit A: The King Flyp), we can’t be 100 percent sure.
EL BESITO SABANERO: This sad tale opens with Power Flow having been dumped by his girlfriend for his buddy DJ Besito, whose powers of seduction involve never unpuckering his lips. Things only get worse as he gets mugged and is denied credit by the corner store. Even his dog, MC Hues, offers little consolation. Will Baby Jesus answer his prayers to return his “nena” to him? “Forever Alone” manages to slip in a couple sly references: to Ecuador’s Delfín Quishpe (“Noooo”), whose “techno-folklore” 9/11 tribute “Torres Gemelas” was a likely inspiration, and to a game-fixing scandal involving El Salvador’s national soccer team (“amañado”)—perhaps the closest Power Flow will ever come to social criticism.
RODOLFO EL GUANACO: Bernal still can’t sing, and he’s the first to admit it (as he states in an interview, “When I’ve got the flow, my voice doesn’t matter”). But where “Forever Alone” disappoints is not the lack of musicianship that was never there to begin with but the absence of Power Flow’s trademark special effects: Bun Bun’s thunderbolts of love, Jaqueando Tu Amor’s clip-art dancing worms. A new puppy can’t make up for this gross negligence. Come on, Power Flow. We know you can do better, which is to say, worse.
FACTOR DE ALEGRÍA: 1/10. Even with more Matrix graphics and singing dogs, this song would be a major bummer.